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Dealing with Children's Lies: Tips for Parents

Lying is a common behaviour that many children engage in, and it can be frustrating and concerning for parents. While lying is a normal part of child development, it's important to address it in a way that helps your child understand why honesty is important and encourages them to tell the truth.

Stay calm and avoid overreacting

It's natural to feel angry or disappointed when you know your child is lying, but it's important to stay calm and avoid overreacting. Children can sense when their parents are upset, and this can make them feel defensive or anxious. Instead of getting angry or upset, take a deep breath and approach the situation with a calm and patient attitude.

Get to the root of the lying

To address lying in children, it's important to understand why they are lying in the first place. Children may lie to avoid getting into trouble, to gain attention or approval, to protect someone else, or to avoid embarrassment or shame. Once you understand why your child is lying, you can address the root cause of the behaviour.

Be clear about your expectations

Children need clear expectations about what is expected of them when it comes to honesty. Make it clear that lying is not acceptable and that there will be consequences for dishonesty. But also reassure your child that you value honesty and will be proud of them for telling the truth, even if it means admitting to a mistake.

Model honesty

Children learn by example, so it's important to model honesty in your own behaviour. Avoid lying in front of your child, even if it's a small white lie. Instead, model honest and respectful communication with others, including your child.

Praise honesty

When your child tells the truth, even if it means admitting to a mistake, be sure to praise them. This reinforces the importance of honesty and encourages your child to continue to be truthful in the future.

Provide consequences for lying

While it's important to stay calm and avoid overreacting, there should be consequences for lying. The consequences should be appropriate for the age and development of your child and should be consistent with your expectations for behaviour. For example, if your child lies about completing their homework, they may lose screen time for the evening.

Seek help if necessary

If your child's lying is persistent or causing problems at school or home, it may be helpful to seek the advice of a professional, such as a therapist or counsellor. They can help you understand why your child is lying and provide strategies for addressing the behaviour.


In conclusion, lying is a common behaviour in children, and it's important to address it in a way that encourages honesty and helps your child understand why it's important to tell the truth. By staying calm, understanding the root of the lying, setting clear expectations, modelling honesty, praising honesty, providing consequences for lying, and seeking help if necessary, you can help your child develop a strong sense of honesty and integrity.

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